It never fails. Once Labour Day and Thanksgiving are behind us, temperatures drop, and we shake off the summer slumber. Fall, like New Year’s, can spark a sense of renewal—a chance to reenergize and envision a productive autumn. Yet, all too often, that initial enthusiasm peters out, and before we know it, we’ve missed an opportunity to create meaningful change.
So, why do we falter? What holds us back? The answer is simple: the constant battle between our motivation and the friction in our way.
Life is a series of micro-decisions
Each day presents us with countless micro-decisions, each reflecting a tug-of-war between motivation and friction. When we choose the path of least resistance, it’s usually because friction—the unseen weight of doubt, hesitation, or overwhelm—pulls us away from our goals. Ideally, we would make decisions that lead to growth, fulfillment, and vitality. But when friction feels like a mountain, motivation alone isn’t always enough to scale it.
And while we’d love to believe we can simply talk ourselves into becoming more motivated, motivation is a stubborn force, deeply rooted in every experience and impression on our conscious and unconscious minds. This inertia is powerful and shifting it can feel like trying to turn a ship in the middle of a storm.
Friction isn’t always what it seems
Interestingly, friction isn’t always an external force. Often, it’s internal, rooted in habits, old fears, or limiting beliefs we haven’t fully faced. Friction shows up as noise—the mental clutter that tells us we can’t, we shouldn’t, or we’re not ready.
But here’s the twist: friction is something we can chip away at. While motivation is like an immovable rock, friction is more malleable, more manageable. History is full of people who faced overwhelming odds yet found a way to succeed.
Take Beethoven, who lost his hearing but adapted by feeling the vibrations of sound. Or Steve Jobs, who returned to
Apple in 1997 and streamlined the product line, reducing complexity to focus on just a few models. Even Marie Kondo’s method simplifies life by decluttering, removing the friction caused by too many choices. Richard Branson delegates tasks outside his strengths, eliminating friction by simplifying decision-making.
These stories aren’t just about success; they’re about understanding that friction can be reduced strategically. It’s not always about pushing harder—it’s about removing obstacles.
The power of small nudges
In previous pieces, I’ve shied away from focusing purely on goals. Grandiose targets can work against us when trying to build momentum. Goals matter, but sometimes set us up for disappointment. What works better? Nudges—small, intentional actions that compound over time.
Let’s shift away from the overwhelming desire to “crush our goals” and instead focus on tiny, deliberate steps that move us forward. Here’s how:
- Pick one annoying thing to change: Start with one area of your life where friction shows up. Maybe it’s something small—a cluttered desk, a pile of laundry, or a habit of skipping breakfast or a run. The key is to choose something that has bothered you for a while but feels manageable.
- Visualize success: Close your eyes and imagine what success looks like when this friction is gone. What does your life feel like when this change has taken root? Envision the relief, the ease, and the joy that comes with conquering this friction. Anchor that feeling in your mind. This is your new reality.
- Break it into nudges: Rather than tackling the whole problem, break it into five to 10 tiny nudges. At least half should focus on making it easier to succeed. For instance, if your goal is to have a nutritious breakfast every day, don’t start by overhauling your entire diet. Instead, buy the ingredients, prep them in batches, and rearrange your kitchen to make it easy to grab what you need in the morning.
- Schedule the first nudge: Put it in your calendar. That first small step is all you need to focus on. When it’s done, schedule the next one. Let these small nudges build on each other until you’re living the vision you imagined.
- Repeat until you win: Keep at it. As you chip away at the friction, you’ll notice motivation becomes less of an issue. You’ve made it easier for yourself to succeed, and with every step, the distance to your goal shrinks.
Mastering the art of small steps
The beauty of this approach is that it doesn’t rely on fleeting bursts of motivation. Instead, it leverages small, sustainable actions that reduces friction bit by bit. With each nudge, you bring yourself closer to success without the overwhelm.
Remember, life isn’t about grand gestures. It’s about mastering the art of small steps that lead to lasting change—the proverbial tortoise and the hare.
And when in doubt… pause, breathe, and Quiet the Noise.
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Read This Story in Our 2024 Fall Fitness Issue
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